


all the rage in nicodranas

by flammablehat



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Breast Fucking, F/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Semi-Public Sex, jfc why is that the only tittyfucking tag it's like nigel thornbury in here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-07
Packaged: 2020-11-26 16:01:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20932907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flammablehat/pseuds/flammablehat
Summary: Caleb likes when Jester reminds him there's still much in the world he can be surprised by, OR: the one where the tiny gramophone in Caleb's brain plays the creaky, 24-hour loop of 'god is a woman'





	all the rage in nicodranas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [grandfatherclock](https://archiveofourown.org/users/grandfatherclock/gifts).

> be not surprised, for this is the fault of the widojest server, specifically AK

He almost didn’t recognize Beau as she shuffled up to his side. The formal expositor garments lent her an almost military gravitas — right up until she jabbed him in the arm. 

“I didn’t do it that hard,” she muttered, seeing his expression. “Look, man, I get it, okay?” Her tone shifted abruptly. “This might not be the best time or place for showing your whole hand, though.”

“What are you talking about?” Caleb hissed, nodding at a drow he recognized from Den Krynn as she passed them, wine glass in hand. Returning his attention to Beau, he found her watching him with a flat expression of impatience. 

“It’s a great dress, I’m not denying that—”

And Caleb followed her line of sight past Caduceus, past Fjord and Nott, straight to where Jester was holding court with no fewer than four unfamiliar drow clustered around her as she laughed and spoke. 

Strange. There had only been two admirers a moment ago. 

“Yeah, you definitely have no idea what I’m talking about,” Beau said. 

“I’m glad we have found something we can agree upon,” Caleb said tightly. Useless protest when his face was so damnably hot. 

“Sure. Look, just... try to be a little less obvious,” Beau said, both eyebrows raised. Before he could give _that_ the reply it deserved she’d slipped off into the crowd. 

Caleb didn’t know why Beau had targeted him with the warning. He was hardly the only one whose attention had been caught. In a sea of somber blacks and deep blues, Jester glowed. Candlelight snagged on the thousands of seed-sized beads sewn and strung in artful curves over her gown. Caleb imagined he could almost hear the faint susurrus of her movement from where he stood. 

“She looks just like her mom, doesn’t she?” 

Caleb startled sharply at Caduceus’ voice, then placed a hand over his eyes. Perhaps Beau had a point. Not that he’d ever admit as much to her. 

“I need a little air, I think,” he said, using the slight berth around Caduceus to slip out of the hall.

* * *

She found him in the library, making it two members of their painfully conspicuous group who’d ignored the barred doors and signage directing people back to the hall and the party. He sighed as she insinuated herself under his arm. 

“You are not supposed to be here,” he said. 

She shrugged, taking hold of his collar and dragging him down into a kiss. He found her dress _did_ make a subtle rustle as she moved, the beading sharp and delicate under his fingers. 

“I saw you staring,” she said, pulling away with an impish grin. “Are you horny for me right now Caleb?” 

He could feel the prickle of heat climbing his neck again. “We are in a library,” he said. 

“I know, I totally didn’t think we’d get to do it in one until we went back to the Empire,” Jester agreed, drawing him back toward the antique-looking chaise against the wall. 

A bubble of hysteria threatened at the base of Caleb’s throat — they’d hardly fallen into bed together days before and already he was seriously considering an assignation in _someone else’s home_ at her invitation. Well. ‘Considering’ might be too generous a word. The press of his cock against his trouser placket suggested he’d blown right past consideration into ready anticipation. 

“Jester,” he tried, weakly, “Jester, anyone could come in—”

“Don’t worry, this will be quick,” she promised, and Caleb didn’t have long to wonder if he should be stung by that insinuation before she knelt up on one of the cushions of the chaise and began to peel the sheer leaves of her bodice down over her breasts. Caleb stared, letting her reach out to yank him forward by the hips, fingers plucking nimbly at his ties. “We really need to work on your focus,” she said, drawing him out of his trousers and into her mouth. 

Caleb sucked in a breath, cupping the back of her neck. “Yes,” he said, transfixed by the flutter of her lashes, the sweet moue of her lips. “Wait, what?” 

She released him with a pop, straightening a little. “I know I’m very beautiful, Caleb, but we should probably still be careful, you know?” 

He nodded, far less willing to argue the point with Jester than he’d been with Beau. She smiled up at him, hooking her fingers in the band of his trousers to draw him closer still. To his surprise, she took his cock and pressed it to her sternum, lining him up in the soft valley of her chest. She tilted her head at what he could only guess was his baffled expression. 

“Have you ever done this before?” she asked.

“No, I cannot say I have,” he said. 

“Oh, it’s very popular in Nicodranas,” she grinned, using her hands to lift her breasts, enveloping him in dense, pillowy warmth. The picture it made sent a shock of heat to the root of his spine. Still partially damp from her mouth, he slid against her skin, his little jolt making her sway back a small measure. “That’s good!” She beamed, all encouragement. “Keep going!” 

Eager as he was to comply, Caleb paused at the imperfect angle and height of their positions. Placing his hand behind her head again, he shuffled forward, easing her into a braced position with her elbows on the back of the chaise. It canted him over her slightly, and when he thrust, her body absorbed his weight like a well-sprung bow. 

“Oh,” he said, all of his remaining hesitance and concern dissolving like a lump of sugar in a hot cup of tea. Jester’s grin was a white flash of sharp teeth, knowing and pleased, and Caleb swept his thumb into the arc of her cheek as he fucked into the tight space she held for him. 

The damning thing of it all was how right she’d been — he was already moments from his crisis, gaze flicking from the hungry delight in Jester’s eyes down to her breasts. Her nipples were soft and dark like bruised fruit, each tipping a smooth, blue swell that mostly obscured the rapid drag of his cock between them. He wanted to bury his face there, he wanted to stroke himself off over her and see what she looked like dressed in white. 

“Are you close?” she asked, curving up into the deteriorating rhythm of his thrusts. 

“Ja, yes,” he said, gasping as she took him in hand and licked him back into her mouth. “Hells, Jester,” he whispered, hand tightening helplessly in her hair as the teasing flicker of her tongue undid him. 

When his mind returned to him, he was surprised to feel a small, unexpected ripple of disappointment he didn’t get to finish on her skin as he’d imagined. He immediately shoved the thought aside as ungrateful. 

As if reading his thoughts, she said, “I didn’t want you to get anything on my dress, because it was a little expensive and also we have to go back to the party. But just so you know, I don’t usually mind getting messy.” 

“That is… good to know,” Caleb said, a little dazed as he tucked himself away, smoothing himself back into a semblance of presentability. Jester had already set her dress to rights and was peering at herself in the imperfect reflection of a dark window. 

“Ready to go back and spy some more?” she asked brightly, meeting his eyes in the glass. 

“As I will ever be,” he said, allowing himself a small, indulgent smile. 

The low lamplight sparkled across her as she turned to him, holding out her hand. He took it, and followed her into the outline of a bright pink door that materialized before her feet.


End file.
